Well, we’re here, again. It’s been almost 8 years since Carson’s last cleft surgery, but 8 years is still not long enough. Those memories flood back on you, and you have to fight that punched-in-the-gut feeling.
Psalm 4:6 “Be anxious for nothing…” kept running through my heart and mind, as they prepped Carson for today’s bone graft surgery.
We walked into the room where he was supposed to get his silly gas, hold Mama’s hand and slowly and peacefully slip into his sleepy state, but that’s not exactly how it happened. The anesthesiologist waltzed in, gave Carson a fist bump and said, “Hey!! You like cool Science stuff!? I’ve got some awesome stuff to show you in the Operating Room! Want to see?!”
Carson said, “Yes!”, waved to us, said “bye,” and that was it. The operating door closed behind them and we were left staring at the door with the nurse.
Not quite what I had planned, but I should know by now that nothing goes according to my plans (thank goodness). God always has the better plan.
Be anxious for nothing…Carson had surly grasped that truth.
The faith of a child…I needed to grasp it, now.
We walked toward the cafeteria to grab a bagel, and that’s when my blessings list started to grow. We began to pass children who were swollen from chemo treatments, children in wheelchairs who would probably never walk again, children with tubes and wires and braces and crutches. As we passed them, I could envision my little petty problems dropping to the floor and being crunched by those kid-sized wheelchairs. No, Carson’s surgery was not just a petty problem, but I could praise the Lord that after only 5 hours we were headed home.
So, this year on Thanksgiving, everything may not be perfect, but God is good and we are blessed. This year, that’s enough for me.
If you’d like to read more about having joy while accepting your child’s cleft, or read about some ideas that were successful for us, when taking care of a child with a cleft lip and palate, click on the links below.